After 20 Years Overseas, Dan Reveals What Single Men Get Wrong

Well, Well, enjoy enjoy enjoy the questions and the questions and the questions and answers. My answers. My answers. My question, your question, your question, your answer. answer. answer. Yes, yes. Yes, yes. So, I have a So, I have a few more questions for few more questions for few more questions for you. you. you. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. We are currently on our We are currently on our little vacation little vacation little vacation in Thailand. We in Thailand. We in Thailand. We are enjoying the are enjoying the are enjoying the beautiful beaches and have beautiful beaches and have beautiful beaches and have just had lunch. just had lunch. just had lunch. Yes. So, the Yes. So, the first question: where was first question: where was the cheapest place you lived the cheapest place you lived the cheapest place you lived abroad? And did abroad? And did abroad? And did you really you really you really like this like this like this lifestyle? lifestyle? I left the I left the United States in United States in United States in 2007, and at the time I 2007, and at the time I 2007, and at the time I left, I had a left, I had a left, I had a job, I was working job, I was working job, I was working abroad. I was earning an abroad. I was earning an abroad. I was earning an American American American salary, but I lived somewhere that salary, but I lived somewhere that salary, but I lived somewhere that was much was much was much cheaper. So I cheaper. So I cheaper. So I had more money had more money had more money than I needed, and to be honest than I needed, and to be honest than I needed, and to be honest , I couldn't , I couldn't , I couldn't spend it all. But spend it all. But spend it all. But later I was later I was later I was fired when fired when fired when part of the company part of the company part of the company I was working for under I was working for under I was working for under contract contract contract closed down. At that time, closed down. At that time, closed down. At that time, you were traveling with you were traveling with you were traveling with me, and I me, and I me, and I suggested suggested suggested trying to live on 2000 trying to live on 2000 trying to live on 2000 a month because I a month because I a month because I was going to create a was going to create a was going to create a website to website to website to earn money for earn money for earn money for further travel further travel further travel so I wouldn't have to so I wouldn't have to so I wouldn't have to go back to go back to go back to America for a damn America for a damn America for a damn job I didn't job I didn't job I didn't want. So I said, " want. So I said, " Let's try living Let's try living Let's try living on 2,000 a month." And you on 2,000 a month." And you on 2,000 a month." And you said, "No, let's said, "No, let's said, "No, let's try living on 1,000 try living on 1,000 try living on 1,000 a month."

a month." a month." Yes. Yes. It seemed a little It seemed a little bold to me, but I bold to me, but I bold to me, but I thought, "Okay, I'll thought, "Okay, I'll thought, "Okay, I'll save 40,000, and we save 40,000, and we save 40,000, and we 'll live on that for 'll live on that for 'll live on that for as long as we can." I as long as we can." I as long as we can." I thought we thought we thought we could live could live could live twice as long if twice as long if twice as long if we tried to we tried to we tried to cut costs. cut costs. So the idea of ​​living on So the idea of ​​living on $1,000 a month $1,000 a month $1,000 a month came from you, and you came from you, and you came from you, and you played a big played a big played a big role in that because you're role in that because you're role in that because you're great at finding great at finding great at finding low prices on everything low prices on everything from apartments to food to from apartments to food to from apartments to food to travel, so in the travel, so in the travel, so in the early years we early years we early years we tried to stay tried to stay tried to stay within a thousand a month. In within a thousand a month. In within a thousand a month. In some months we some months we some months we succeeded, sometimes succeeded, sometimes succeeded, sometimes even a even a even a little less, sometimes little less, sometimes little less, sometimes a little more. So did a little more. So did a little more. So did we have fun? I would we have fun? I would we have fun? I would say that when I say that when I say that when I first started my first started my first started my Vagabond Awake channel, I was Vagabond Awake channel, I was Vagabond Awake channel, I was releasing five videos releasing five videos releasing five videos a week. And it was a week. And it was a week. And it was very, very hard very, very hard very, very hard work, work, work, frankly. We frankly. We frankly. We had fun, but not like had fun, but not like had fun, but not like now, where I now, where I now, where I release two videos a release two videos a release two videos a week and you week and you week and you release two videos release two videos release two videos a week. So, um, that a week. So, um, that a week. So, um, that was fun. I would have preferred was fun. I would have preferred was fun. I would have preferred everything to have happened the way it did everything to have happened the way it did everything to have happened the way it did , and that we were , and that we were , and that we were able to continue able to continue able to continue living abroad, but it's living abroad, but it's living abroad, but it's more fun now, although it more fun now, although it more fun now, although it was good then too.

was good then too. was good then too. Therefore. Therefore. Therefore. A lot of people want A lot of people want A lot of people want to know about your to know about your to know about your single life, single life, single life, you know? So, if you you know? So, if you you know? So, if you were single were single were single today, what would today, what would today, what would worry you the most worry you the most worry you the most about moving about moving about moving abroad alone? abroad alone? For the past 19 years, I've been in been in a relationship for almost all but two years, and you and a relationship for almost all but two years, and you and a relationship for almost all but two years, and you and I I I will probably be together for 10 years soon, right? will probably be together for 10 years soon, right? Um, and before that I was Um, and before that I was single for a couple of years. single for a couple of years. And, um, when I was And, um, when I was single, it wasn't as much single, it wasn't as much single, it wasn't as much fun as fun as traveling with you, of course. Um, it's fun when you see Um, it's fun when you see something beautiful, something beautiful, something beautiful, yeah. yeah. yeah. Whatever it is: a fish, Whatever it is: a fish, Whatever it is: a fish, an animal, or a tree, an animal, or a tree, comment on it comment on it comment on it to someone, and then to someone, and then to someone, and then discuss it discuss it discuss it later. You remember this, later. You remember this, later. You remember this, you remember that. So you remember that. So you remember that. So traveling with traveling with traveling with someone is more fun. Um, someone is more fun. Um, someone is more fun. Um, so my biggest so my biggest so my biggest concern if I concern if I concern if I were single would be were single would be were single would be trying to trying to trying to find a relationship again. Um, find a relationship again. Um, find a relationship again. Um, when I was doing this when I was doing this when I was doing this at first, you know, those at first, you know, those at first, you know, those few years when I few years when I few years when I was single before was single before was single before meeting you, it meeting you, it meeting you, it was a little difficult. And, was a little difficult. And, was a little difficult. And, um, I think I would um, I think I would um, I think I would do something different now.

do something different now. do something different now. We just We just We just interviewed a veteran interviewed a veteran interviewed a veteran who was talking about how who was talking about how who was talking about how he met people he met people he met people overseas. I would probably overseas. I would probably overseas. I would probably follow his example, follow his example, follow his example, do the same thing do the same thing do the same thing he does. What he did he does. What he did was basically a few was basically a few was basically a few changes, but I would probably changes, but I would probably changes, but I would probably sign up for a sign up for a sign up for a few sites, but few sites, but few sites, but only where I'm only where I'm only where I'm located. I wouldn't located. I wouldn't located. I wouldn't place them in other place them in other place them in other places like I did places like I did places like I did last time. This last time. This last time. This wastes a lot of time. wastes a lot of time. wastes a lot of time. Mhm. Mhm. Mhm. And I would send 25 And I would send 25 And I would send 25 messages a day. messages a day. And I would screen out everyone And I would screen out everyone who responded. And I would who responded. And I would who responded. And I would search in search in Southeast Asia for reasons I'll Southeast Asia for reasons I'll explain later, explain later, explain later, but I would screen out but I would screen out but I would screen out anyone who responded anyone who responded anyone who responded and either asked for money and either asked for money and either asked for money or spoke to me as or spoke to me as or spoke to me as if they didn't understand what if they didn't understand what if they didn't understand what we were we were we were talking about earlier. In talking about earlier. In other words, they other words, they should be should be should be present in our present in our present in our existing conversation, existing conversation, existing conversation, not asking, "Who's that not asking, "Who's that not asking, "Who's that guy again?" "What was the guy again?" "What was the guy again?" "What was the last time we talked? last time we talked? " If I sense " If I sense " If I sense that tone in a conversation with that tone in a conversation with that tone in a conversation with them, I would, I would cut off them, I would, I would cut off them, I would, I would cut off contact. Also, if contact. Also, if contact. Also, if they asked for money, I they asked for money, I they asked for money, I would cut off contact.

would cut off contact. would cut off contact. And the last thing I would And the last thing I would And the last thing I would do is have them do is have them do is have them agree to agree to agree to meet with me meet with me meet with me within 10 messages. within 10 messages. within 10 messages. Because I don't want Because I don't want Because I don't want to waste my time to waste my time to waste my time . My experience of . My experience of . My experience of dating in the US, and dating in the US, and dating in the US, and also after I also after I also after I left, shows that left, shows that left, shows that people are sometimes insincere people are sometimes insincere people are sometimes insincere about their photos, about their photos, about their photos, stories, or anything stories, or anything stories, or anything else. So it's best else. So it's best else. So it's best to meet fairly to meet fairly to meet fairly quickly to see quickly to see quickly to see if there's a basic attraction, and if there's a basic attraction, and if there's a basic attraction, and if their if their if their narrative matches who narrative matches who narrative matches who they really are when you they really are when you they really are when you meet them in person. And meet them in person. And meet them in person. And I would quickly weed out I would quickly weed out I would quickly weed out everyone until I found everyone until I found everyone until I found someone who was interesting to me someone who was interesting to me someone who was interesting to me and who paid attention and who paid attention and who paid attention to me and what to me and what to me and what we were talking about. And we were talking about. And we were talking about. And who would be fun who would be fun who would be fun to spend time with. So I would to spend time with. So I would to spend time with. So I would be a little more be a little more be a little more picky, I think, picky, I think, picky, I think, and hopefully it would and hopefully it would and hopefully it would go faster that way. go faster that way. Is it me...I'm also the kind of Is it me...I'm also the kind of person who doesn't want to person who doesn't want to talk too much during, talk too much during, you know, texting. you know, texting. Just, you know, Just, you know, a few messages, and a few messages, and a few messages, and then I'll ask you out then I'll ask you out then I'll ask you out , and we'll , and we'll , and we'll see if see if see if I'm attractive to you I'm attractive to you or not. or not. or not. Yes. Yes. That's how Yes. Yes. That's how Yes. Yes. That's how we we we met too. We didn't met too. We didn't communicate that much.

communicate that much. I think we I think we I think we only exchanged two or three only exchanged two or three only exchanged two or three messages and messages and messages and then we met. then we met. then we met. Yes. Good. Next Yes. Good. Next Yes. Good. Next question: What is something a single man can question: What is something a single man can question: What is something a single man can do abroad do abroad that would be that would be much harder to much harder to much harder to do if you lived in the do if you lived in the do if you lived in the US? US? Well, there are many things Well, there are many things that are different, that are different, that are different, but I'll get straight but I'll get straight but I'll get straight to the point. In the US, it to the point. In the US, it to the point. In the US, it takes more takes more takes more money to live a money to live a money to live a lifestyle that is lifestyle that is lifestyle that is attractive attractive attractive to the opposite to the opposite to the opposite sex. sex. sex. Mhm. Mhm. Mhm. Everyone wants to see Everyone wants to see Everyone wants to see your car, your home, your car, your home, your car, your home, whether you travel, how whether you travel, how whether you travel, how often, what clothes you often, what clothes you often, what clothes you wear, whether wear, whether wear, whether my my my friends like you. In the US, you friends like you. In the US, you friends like you. In the US, you need to give off need to give off need to give off a lot of social a lot of social a lot of social signals to be signals to be signals to be attractive. In attractive. In attractive. In Southeast Southeast Southeast Asia, as a man, Asia, as a man, Asia, as a man, I'm 66 now, but when I'm 66 now, but when I'm 66 now, but when we met we met we met I was 56, the amount of I was 56, the amount of I was 56, the amount of money that's needed there, money that's needed there, money that's needed there, for example, is, for example, is, for example, is, you know, a third of what it you know, a third of what it you know, a third of what it takes in the US to takes in the US to takes in the US to be an attractive be an attractive be an attractive partner. So I would partner. So I would partner. So I would say that money is say that money is say that money is one of the factors. And also one of the factors. And also , in the US you have to , in the US you have to , in the US you have to give very subtle give very subtle give very subtle signals to become signals to become signals to become attractive.

attractive. attractive. Mhm. Mhm. Mhm. But when you But when you But when you show up in show up in show up in Southeast Southeast Southeast Asia, you're already Asia, you're already Asia, you're already considered a winner considered a winner considered a winner because you've flown in from the because you've flown in from the because you've flown in from the other side of the world. And other side of the world. And other side of the world. And everyone assumes that everyone assumes that everyone assumes that you're from the West, you're you're from the West, you're you're from the West, you're just rich and, you just rich and, you just rich and, you know, you're interesting, not like know, you're interesting, not like know, you're interesting, not like those guys who those guys who those guys who live across the street live across the street live across the street or down the street. or down the street. or down the street. So you have a real So you have a real So you have a real advantage over the advantage over the advantage over the locals, locals, locals, if you will. And so, I if you will. And so, I if you will. And so, I would say, it's would say, it's much easier much easier to find a better, more to find a better, more to find a better, more interesting partner in Southeast Asia interesting partner in Southeast Asia interesting partner in Southeast Asia than at home, just by than at home, just by than at home, just by showing up there. showing up there. I I left the United left the United left the United States 19 years ago. I help States 19 years ago. I help States 19 years ago. I help people like you people like you people like you retire safely retire safely retire safely abroad. abroad. abroad. In fact, I provide In fact, I provide In fact, I provide more free more free more free content than others content than others content than others hide behind paywalls hide behind paywalls hide behind paywalls . Start by . Start by . Start by downloading my downloading my downloading my free free free e-book at e-book at e-book at vagabondbuddha.com. It vagabondbuddha.com. It vagabondbuddha.com. It describes the basic describes the basic describes the basic settings settings settings needed to needed to needed to communicate with banks, communicate with banks, communicate with banks, mail, phones, and mail, phones, and mail, phones, and family before family before family before departure. Don't pay departure. Don't pay departure. Don't pay $200 for a $200 for a $200 for a short phone short phone short phone call. The reality is that call. The reality is that call. The reality is that you you you don't even know what don't even know what don't even know what questions to questions to questions to ask yet. Just ask yet. Just ask yet. Just read my read my read my free free free e-book and e-book and e-book and email me email me any questions any questions any questions .

. . Check out the Check out the Check out the free free free curriculum for my curriculum for my curriculum for my course on course on course on retiring abroad and retiring abroad and retiring abroad and see how I have structured everything for see how I have structured everything for see how I have structured everything for you. My you. My you. My library is an library is an library is an open book. open book. open book. Okay, back Okay, back Okay, back to the video. to the video. Name three countries Name three countries where you think where you think where you think single people might single people might single people might have a better quality of have a better quality of have a better quality of life than in the life than in the life than in the United States. United States. Okay, I'll break this into Okay, I'll break this into two categories. The first two categories. The first is sedentary people. Some is sedentary people. Some is sedentary people. Some people, when they people, when they people, when they move move move abroad, you know, they're abroad, you know, they're abroad, you know, they're just looking for one just looking for one just looking for one place. They want to place. They want to place. They want to fly in, fly in, fly in, land, settle down, land, settle down, land, settle down, and just stay in and just stay in and just stay in one place. They are not one place. They are not one place. They are not interested in traveling, interested in traveling, interested in traveling, they are one group. The other they are one group. The other they are one group. The other group is the slow group is the slow group is the slow travelers. They travelers. They travelers. They want to wander want to wander want to wander around, looking for a around, looking for a around, looking for a place they'll really place they'll really place they'll really like, or like, or like, or just want to just want to just want to keep keep keep traveling. There are two traveling. There are two traveling. There are two different types of single different types of single different types of single people who people who people who move move move abroad, and there are probably abroad, and there are probably abroad, and there are probably many variations, but many variations, but many variations, but I will cover these two I will cover these two I will cover these two main ideas. Someone who main ideas. Someone who main ideas. Someone who is settled just wants to is settled just wants to is settled just wants to move to one move to one move to one place and wants to place and wants to place and wants to explore explore explore dating there. If you dating there. If you dating there. If you say "single," say "single," say "single," let's say they let's say they let's say they want to go on a want to go on a want to go on a date. I would say it's the date. I would say it's the date. I would say it's the Philippines, Philippines, Philippines, Thailand, and Vietnam. These are Thailand, and Vietnam. These are Thailand, and Vietnam. These are three places where three places where three places where dating would be dating would be dating would be perfectly acceptable.

perfectly acceptable. You will be able to find a You will be able to find a better partner than better partner than better partner than in your home country in your home country . And there will be certain . And there will be certain . And there will be certain difficulties, language, etc., difficulties, language, etc., difficulties, language, etc., depending on which depending on which depending on which country you choose. country you choose. country you choose. But now about the " But now about the " slow" slow" slow" travelers—this is a travelers—this is a travelers—this is a completely different completely different completely different category. You see, category. You see, category. You see, they want more than just they want more than just they want more than just finding the best finding the best finding the best partner, if partner, if partner, if possible. They also possible. They also possible. They also want to be want to be want to be able to take able to take able to take their new love with their new love with their new love with them on their world travels them on their world travels . So for such people, . So for such people, . So for such people, I would recommend Malaysia, I would recommend Malaysia, I would recommend Malaysia, Poland, or Romania. In Poland, or Romania. In Poland, or Romania. In these three places there are these three places there are these three places there are beautiful women, or, beautiful women, or, beautiful women, or, let's say, beautiful let's say, beautiful let's say, beautiful people. Women there people. Women there people. Women there are also looking for their happiness. are also looking for their happiness. are also looking for their happiness. But they also have But they also have But they also have something very valuable for something very valuable for something very valuable for the traveler who is in no the traveler who is in no the traveler who is in no hurry. hurry. hurry. They can take They can take They can take their passport and their passport and their passport and go anywhere in go anywhere in go anywhere in the world without any the world without any the world without any problems. For example, problems. For example, problems. For example, if you have a if you have a if you have a Malaysian Malaysian Malaysian passport, you can passport, you can passport, you can go almost go almost go almost anywhere I can go, and anywhere I can go, and anywhere I can go, and even a few more even a few more even a few more places. Your passport places. Your passport places. Your passport is valued more than mine is valued more than mine . The . The . The American American American passport has been passport has been passport has been losing ground a bit lately for losing ground a bit lately for losing ground a bit lately for various reasons that I won't various reasons that I won't go into. But go into. But your passport has maintained your passport has maintained your passport has maintained its position and even its position and even its position and even become more desirable.

become more desirable. become more desirable. This also applies to This also applies to This also applies to Poland. This is an EU country Poland. This is an EU country Poland. This is an EU country where beautiful where beautiful where beautiful men and women live. men and women live. The cost of living is also lower there, so it's The cost of living is also lower there, so it's easier to seem " easier to seem " important" important" important" if you come to if you come to if you come to Poland. This is also Poland. This is also Poland. This is also true for true for true for Romania. Your money Romania. Your money Romania. Your money has more has more has more value in Romania and value in Romania and value in Romania and Poland, and both Poland, and both Poland, and both countries have countries have countries have extremely nice extremely nice extremely nice people to people to people to meet if that's what meet if that's what meet if that's what interests you. So, these are interests you. So, these are interests you. So, these are three different countries and three different countries and three different countries and two different approaches to two different approaches to two different approaches to dating abroad. dating abroad. Question: What is the Question: What is the biggest mistake biggest mistake biggest mistake single men make when single men make when moving moving abroad? abroad? The answer to this is very The answer to this is very clear, relevant, and clear, relevant, and clear, relevant, and undeniable. Don't undeniable. Don't undeniable. Don't try to try to try to buy favor. buy favor. If you buy If you buy favors, you'll favors, you'll favors, you'll find yourself in a find yourself in a find yourself in a relationship where you don't relationship where you don't relationship where you don't know if the person is know if the person is know if the person is with you because of you or with you because of you or with you because of you or because of your money. because of your money.

So I would stay So I would stay away from " away from " professionals," if I professionals," if I professionals," if I may may may say so. And from say so. And from say so. And from people who may not people who may not people who may not call themselves that, call themselves that, call themselves that, but who constantly but who constantly but who constantly need a lot of need a lot of need a lot of money, because it will become a money, because it will become a money, because it will become a problem for you. I would problem for you. I would problem for you. I would look for a real look for a real look for a real relationship, similar to a relationship, similar to a relationship, similar to a casual acquaintance: casual acquaintance: casual acquaintance: a guy and a girl a guy and a girl a guy and a girl go out to dinner, go out to dinner, go out to dinner, maybe the guy maybe the guy maybe the guy pays for the dinner, pays for the dinner, pays for the dinner, but he doesn't pay but he doesn't pay but he doesn't pay the woman, like the woman, like the woman, like a professional, to be with a professional, to be with a professional, to be with him. This is the him. This is the him. This is the biggest biggest biggest mistake mistake mistake people make. And it's easy to people make. And it's easy to people make. And it's easy to get caught up in that get caught up in that get caught up in that because when you because when you because when you move move move abroad, you know, some of the abroad, you know, some of the abroad, you know, some of the women you'll women you'll women you'll meet meet meet might might might only be making $300 or $500 only be making $300 or $500 only be making $300 or $500 a month. And they a month. And they a month. And they give half of give half of give half of it to their parents or it to their parents or it to their parents or someone else, barely someone else, barely someone else, barely making ends meet making ends meet making ends meet . So it can . So it can . So it can be tempting be tempting be tempting to become that same to become that same to become that same knight in shining knight in shining knight in shining armor who armor who armor who comes in and gives them comes in and gives them comes in and gives them $500 or $1,000 a $500 or $1,000 a $500 or $1,000 a month, or whatever month, or whatever month, or whatever your your your fortune allows. And then you fortune allows. And then you fortune allows. And then you think, "Oh, I'm a hero." think, "Oh, I'm a hero." But this creates false But this creates false signals that prevent you from signals that prevent you from signals that prevent you from building real building real building real relationships. So be relationships. So be relationships. So be restrained, be restrained, be restrained, be modest, don't modest, don't modest, don't brag about brag about brag about how rich you are, how rich you are, how rich you are, how cool you are, how cool you are, how cool you are, what your pension is, or what your pension is, or what your pension is, or what assets you have.

what assets you have. Hold all of this. Hold all of this. Excessive talk is Excessive talk is Excessive talk is harmful. Don't do harmful. Don't do harmful. Don't do this. Just be more this. Just be more this. Just be more humble. And don't humble. And don't humble. And don't buy love, then buy love, then buy love, then everything will be much everything will be much everything will be much better for you. better for you. better for you. If you have any If you have any If you have any questions you questions you questions you want to ask, want to ask, want to ask, you can write them in you can write them in you can write them in the comments and we the comments and we the comments and we will combine all will combine all will combine all the questions to the questions to the questions to make a special make a special make a special new video for you. new video for you. Thank you very much for Thank you very much for watching, see you watching, see you watching, see you in the next video. in the next video. in the next video. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.